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Born in Our Hearts

kyrgyzstan adoption story - born in our hearts

Kyrgyzstan Adoption Story:
Born in Our Hearts

 

You know I always heard other adoptive moms say that their adopted children were “born in their hearts”. But, I never fully understood just how strongly I would FEEL that. Bringing Anara into our family was one of the 4 most amazing experiences of my life. No, it wasn’t exactly the same as carrying a baby in my womb for 9 months and giving birth. But, it was every bit as meaningful, exciting, and powerful.

I loved my three biological children with all of my heart from the moment I found out that I was pregnant with them. Each day that passed I got to know them more, even before they were born I knew what their little personalities were like. Anara was different…I fell in love with her photograph before I got to know her. The day I opened up the email from the agency with her information I cried, just like I did on the three mornings that I took pregnancy tests! I was going to have a baby! I didn’t go through typical labor, but adopting Anara proved to be a much longer labor of love!
Walking into the orphanage and seeing her bouncing in her little swing is the most precious memory, I will never forget it…again I bawled! I held her close and kissed her and told her I loved her, and that Jesus loved her.

She was mine, there was no doubt in my mind that she was my daughter. The most excruciating part of the whole process was leaving my daughter in a third world orphanage. Do you know what it is like to turn around and walk away from your child for 2 months? When you are pregnant you are never without your child, you have control over how they are cared for. You protect them and nourish them, its all up to you. When you adopt from Kyrgyzstan you don’t have that luxury. But knowing what kind of life she would have if we didn’t adopt her wasn’t even an option. The only way I was able to walk away from Anara was knowing without a shadow of a doubt that my daughter was being left safely in the arms of Jesus. She always was and is His child. I said when we first started looking at adoption that I could NEVER go to Kyrgyzstan! Never say never, God may have a different plan than you do 🙂

Many of you know that we had some difficulties starting a family. I have endometriosis and it made things a little complicated. While we were very fortunate that we didn’t have to struggle for years like many people do, it gave us a taste of what it is like desperately want a baby and fear that it may never happen. I had people tell me, “Oh, just adopt and you’ll get pregnant”, that drove me nuts! First of all, you have to be ready to let go of the idea of having a biological child. Second, adoption is not second best! It is simply a different avenue to becoming parents. Neither one is better than the other, just different. No matter how your child comes into your family, the love that you have for them is immeasurable. After bringing Anara home, I pity those that haven’t experienced the miracle of adoption!

born in our hearts adoption story anara at poolThere is no feeling in the world like having your child placed in your arms whether it is after 20hrs of labor in a hospital , or months of waiting for a court decision in an orphanage. Children are a gift from God. Anara has filled a hole in my heart that I didn’t even know was there, she has made our family complete. When I sit back and think about all that happened to bring her home I am amazed at the way God orchestrated it all. He loved us all enough to put together all of the pieces.

If you are waiting to become a family, know that God is faithful! He has a plan for your family, and in His time He will see it to completion…you just have to be patient. Who knows, your child may be where you least expect them to be, maybe halfway around the world in a country you’ve never even heard of…like Kyrgyzstan. ~

Adoption Story written by Tim and Hilary, adoptive parents of Anara. Edited by KTA